Look, I'm not doing this for you, but for my own dark and twisted reasons. Oh, and because everyone else is doing it.


June 03, 2005

nosehair portent - need peanut gallery feedback please!

This is, yet, another sign that I should take a break from dating.

I've been out on three dates now with a very nice guy. Tall, well-eduated, going places, reads good stuff (not just the damn Da Vinci Code - which is, by the way, NOT a great book but merely a fun beach read), but I've got some issues. Yeah. Shocker.

The problem is that I keep thinking about these relatively minor issues he has (nose hair, needs a pedicure badly) and realize that they should just be minor. But (and it is a big one) I keep seeing those looming nosehairs as he leans in to kiss me (and the kisses need a little work - bit too sloppy for me) and I just cringe. The more I think about it, the more my interest declines.

Once upon a time, I had a beau who could tell me if I needed to bleach the stache and who would let me groom his eyebrows. Obviously, he was way more metro than the current datee, and we were good friends. As a result, I wasn't insulted when he called me his little puertorican boy (which explains the little bottle of facial hair bleach under my sink).

Explaining my hygienic needs to a new beau - and one I'm not entirely convinced of - is impossible. Or is it? He's a nice guy. He thinks I'm beautiful; but this is a sensitive area. I'd really like to give him a good shot at this, but the nosehair has gotta go. Is there a nice way to relay this to him? In my family, we wait till Christmas and put electric nosehair trimmers in my dad and brother in law's stockings. I think the fourth date might be too soon for electric hair removal devices, but maybe I can talk him into getting a joint pedicure with me... (I sure as hell ain't touching his toenails.)

I was thinking that I could get very tipsy and then tell him. If you have better ideas please help! The looming nosehair is just making the insomnia worse.

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