Look, I'm not doing this for you, but for my own dark and twisted reasons. Oh, and because everyone else is doing it.


August 06, 2006

security doors - ugly but necessary

Are you aware of how easy it is to break into a house? Or, specifically, my apartment? Well, without the security doors it would be a cakewalk.

Around 11 am, while I was accomplishing an astonishing number of domestic tasks for a Sunday morning, I managed to lock myself out of my apartment's backdoor. I've done it once before, but the landlord was home. However, they decided to really inconvenience me by going on vacation and the neighbors were nowhere to be found (unlike the landlords, who like to hoe-down regularly, I had no idea the neighbors had lives). I was outside in my pajamas and the front door's security door was locked.

So, I did what any normal person would do. I used some extremely filthy language and then grabbed a little garden tool (it was spade-ish) and went to work on loosening things up around the door frame and the knob. It popped open with surprisingly little resistance (kinda like me, except with whisky instead of a gardening tool). And the lesson here, my friends? If the government thing doesn't work out, I can always fall back on that lucrative enterprise known as breaking-in and stealing stuff.

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