weak

I'm so ashamed.

Yesterday, I found myself perusing the nerve personals, reactivated my profile, and sent one of those damnable winks to a man. This afternoon I came back to my senses and hid my profile again. I'm just not ready. Not emotionally, or physically, or mentally ready.

Moreover, I find myself longing for those sorts of situations where you meet people naturally. Why can't we meet people naturally anymore? As in, at the coffee shop, in the bookstore, at a friend's party, standing on the metro platform? Is it because we're too absorbed in our sudoku puzzles and blackberries? Do we avoid rejection by avoiding the opportunity for rejection? Yes. And I've been guilty of all these things, too.

Back to the self-imposed online dating exile. Well, except for chemistry.com since it really doesn't count (divorced single dads who live 40 miles away=not viable) as online dating.